Advanced Stress Management

Stress is defined as anything that disturbs one’s mental and physical wellbeing.  Continuous exposure can lead to anxiety and physical manifestations of stress e.g. palpitations, IBS, muscular pains and aches.

Anxiety on the other hand is defined as a psycho-physiological response to anticipation of unreal or imaginary dangers.

In my stress management sessions, we look at your anxiety and stress levels.  Some people have both in equal parts, others will suffer mostly from one or the other.  Someone who suffers from a fear of flying (anxiety rating high) may not necessarily be stressed in other areas of their lives (they are stressed at the thought of flying) and some one suffering from a heavy stressload at work and home may not necessarily get anxiety at the thought of flying.

Stress can be brought on by poor time management skills, working or being in an unhappy relationship and not having the confidence to make a change, a feeling of not really deserving the position attained at work, inability to say “no”, imbalance between home and life.  All these can be changed.  When suffering from stress it is very hard to sort out what’s what, everything takes on equal proportion of effect on your stress.

You can make the change and lead a better and more fulfilled life.  You deserve that, don’t you?

For appointments call 086 1038892.  Office: Upper Baggot Street, Dublin 2.  Evening appointments available.

Following on from the last post:

Do you commute to work either by car or public transport?  Do you feel angry or annoyed at this “wasted” journeying?  Why not use the time to listen to some inspirational or motivational speakers or a CD book to pass the time effectively.  One of my favourite motivational speakers is Tony Robbins.  What a way to pass the time.  You feel pumped and ready for action by the time you get to work.  Perhaps on the journey home, listen to some mellow music to start the relaxation process so that by the time you get home, you are ready and mentally prepared for excited children!

So, without actually cutting any time from another activity, you can actually motivate yourself for work, calm yourself for home and enjoy the benefit of actually commuting!

It’s just an idea and it does work.  It’s a small but significant step.

Office: Upper Baggot Street, Dublin 2.  Evening appointments available.

Poor time management can be a major source of stress.  How many times do you think - “I have no time for _________”, “if only there were more hours”.  The truth is we do have enough time, the problem is not lack of time, it is lack of managing time efficiently.  How can hypnosis help.  Hypnotic CDs can be played as you go to sleep - the first step in finding time to relax your mind and body so that you get a good restful sleep.  Think about how much time is badly managed at work - take a look at what needs to be done - prioritize and complete tasks.  Meetings can sometimes be viewed as wasting time but they are important in terms of building and forwarding your career.  A session of hypnosis can help you achieve a positive frame of mind with regard to certain aspects of work which are irritants to you.  Think of the time that is wasted complaining about what you have to do, or places you have to visit instead see them as ways to be noticed, to progress.  You will be amazed at how different and buzzed you will feel.  This good feeling will have a positive knock on effect in your working life and in your home life.

Office:  Upper Baggot Street, Dublin 2.  Evening appointments available.

Do you suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)?  While there is no known cause or cure for IBS, sufferers know that stress and anxiety can exacerbate symptoms.  Hypnosis (and not hypnotherapy) can greatly reduce your stress and therefore have a positive effect on your gastro-intestinal system.  With hypnosis, sessions are conducted using what is called gut-directed hypnosis.  Hypnotic suggestions are made to your sub-consciousness mind to either increase the movement in your gut or decrease it (depending on the sufferer’s condition).  A number of sessions are advised to monitor and adjust hypnotic treatment.  Relaxation is a positive side effect of the treatment.  As you learn to manage stress, you are learning to control your IBS symptoms.

Office: Upper Baggot Street, Dublin 2.

Make sure your sink is clean and clear every morning before you go to work, before you drop the kids off to school.  Make it a daily ritual to either wash your dishes and put away or put them in the dishwasher and clean down the surfaces.

A little thing but a task completed early in the morning - how hard can that be?

Top Tip 2:

Learn to breathe correctly.  As teenagers and adults we unlearn how to breathe properly.  When anxious and stressed the tendency is to shallow breathe which can lead to hyperventilation and ultimately to passing out.  Breathing deeply forces the body into a relaxed state therefore immediately easing one’s state of mind.

Do this:

• Take a deep breath in for the count of 6,
• hold for 6,
• release for 6.
• Repeat 3 times or more as you need it. 

What this does is to force your shoulders to drop down from their stress alertedness to relaxed position.  When stressed we hold our shoulders tensely, (do you find you get stress related headaches? then this will work a treat).

If time permits as you take the final breath, close your eyes and visualise what we call a “safe haven” - perhaps you’re by the beach or in outer space - some place that is your haven where we feel the sun on your face, hear the gentle lap of the waves on the sandy beach - whatever or wherever this place is bring all your senses in on scene and you are amazed at how much calmer you feel.

Go for a country walk, spend some time in your garden.  Communing with nature is a great way to de-stress.  Touching the soil or enjoying the natural beauty around you is an incredibly grounding experience.  If for some reason you cannot leave the confines of a city - then grow some herbs, enjoy your plants, change their soil.

Just take a few moments each day to enjoy the world around you.

If you never say “no” what is your “yes” worth?

Saying “yes” and “no” clearly builds confidence and rids us of the misconception that we are powerless.

Marsha Sintar

If saying “no”is a new concept for you, start by saying “can I think about that and get back to you”.

Isn’t it better to do a few jobs excellently rather than all jobs badly?

Poor time management can be major source of stress.  Learn to manage your time and you will be amazed at the time you gain.

Tip #1:

Write down all the things that are stressing you.  One of the first things we do when stressed is to globalize everything “it’s all gone wrong”, “why does everything happen to me”.

Beside each point (make sure you have plenty of room and plenty of paper) - make a note about whether it is something you can control or not.

If you can control it - make a plan of how you are going to control and when you are going to control the stressful situation.  Don’t just think about it - write it down as it gives you a visual that you can control your stress.

If it is something you cannot control - write down why it stresses you so much.  If the weather is stressing you (and if you’re in Ireland you will understand that we have had no summer this year!) - unless you work in the agricultural community - the weather really is not something you can complain about now is it?

Why do this?

It is about putting things into perspective.

Tip #2 to follow.

 Without stress man would not be here today.  The stress response is the body’s way of shutting down function in the body in order to pump up the muscles for fight or for flight when threatened.  A “perceived” threat is enough to start the fight or flight response in the body!  When the threat abates, the body returns to normal function, or so the theory goes.  21^st century living for most people results in a quasi-stressed state all the time.  This is not healthy.  Do you suffer from backache or tension headaches?  Is your mood up and down?  Being stressed affects your eating habits.  Perhaps you have ulcers or some digestive problems.  Did you know that stress is repressed anger?  Who are you angry with?  Knowing how to express anger in an appropriate way has to be and can be learned.  Anger is a valid emotion – it is how it is expressed is the problem.  It is important to recognize your rise in stress levels – what are your triggers?  Perhaps it starts with an upset tummy or a knot in the pit of your stomach.  Feeling stressed triggers specific thought patterns.  In stress management, these thought patterns can be interrupted and new suggestions are made so that you relearn how to think, behave and act to your benefit.  These changes need to consist of assertive thoughts and behaviours which in turn lead to a decrease in stress.It is not enough just to know how to be physically assertive.  Your words and tone must be congruent with your body language.  You need to feel you have the right to be assertive, know how to keep yourself calm and voice your irritation in a calm and controlled way.  Have you ever noticed that when you are stressed how you may turn “everything” into a catastrophe.  How easy is it for you to get into an argument?  Is this the way you want to live?  I don’t think so.  Learning relaxation techniques and coping strategies can help the sufferer enormously.  Learning to handle stress will have a huge knock-on effect in your life.Do you ever find yourself having a couple of drinks after a day’s work?  Has this increased from one drink to a couple to a bottle?  Do you take recreational drugs?  Then at least you know you have a problem and are self medicating.  However, these do not help and only exacerbate the problem.  Pick up the phone and ask for help.  You need to rediscover your hidden strengths and need help to find these strengths as you discover a new way to harness the power of your own mind.  Empowerment is the greatest gift you can give yourself.  The number of stress management sessions will vary depending upon your stress levels.  This can only be determined in consultation.  It is important to ensure that you are open and honest with your stress management consultant, after all, he/she is not a mind reader and the more information you give the better equipped he is in designing your stress management programme.Work stress can be a particular problem, after all we spend most of your day in the office.  Stress in small amounts is good – you know you are alive, it gives you motivation to make a change, pumps you up before a presentation.  But it can also lead to unwanted physical symptoms.  Is work particularly stressful – are you overloaded with work, can you ask for help?  Maybe you have been promoted and you are having difficulty in your new position – is it through lack of confidence or lack of training.  Do you hate what you do?  Well, what do you really want to do?  Make a plan and start working on it so that one day your vocation can become your real work.  Life should be enjoyed not endured.